To the Angry White Men on the Internet

IDGAF what you think

Last year I published a piece called “What Most Men Don’t Understand About Living In Fear”. I described an unsettling personal experience and went on to share thoughts on street harassment, white male privilege, and why dealing with the patriarchy can be frustrating. It was in response to a Human Parts prompt about remaining silent so it was fitting; in most instances where I’ve been the target of harassment, I have remained silent for one reason or another.

Apparently, this was very triggering for some men on the Internet.

While plenty of people (men and women) shared supportive comments, more than a few responses berated the piece and made it clear they not only didn’t read it in full but also didn’t take a single moment to absorb the words and their meaning.

Any guesses as to who was posting the latter?

In my typical fashion, I either ignored those comments or replied with a single snarky response before moving on with my day. As I wrote in the original story, sometimes it’s just not worth the effort to make myself understood to someone who doesn’t seek to understand.

But as I continued to follow the comments and responses, I noticed several of these men returned to edit or elaborate on their initial response. Unprompted. In one case, it was several days later and the anonymous writer hashed out several new paragraphs admonishing what I had written.

As the youths would say, why so pressed?

If you come back to edit your comment, well. I think I can safely say I’ve gotten under your skin. Something about what I said or the way I said it bothered you so much, it lived rent-free in your head until you couldn’t take it anymore. You had to scratch the itch. You had to come back and give that woman on the internet another piece of your mind.

Believe it or not, a woman in this day and age is capable of having an opinion you don’t agree with. That opinion doesn’t need to align with yours for you to respect her. Her opinion may be shaped by a firsthand experience you’ve never encountered. It’s possible she knows more about what she’s talking about than you do.

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